The Madness of Hope

Bittersweet

“I’m looking forward to our Bible Study today. However, it is bittersweet as today is the last of your messages.” That was a comment on my Facebook wall Wednesday as I headed out to our ladies bible study.
I was given the honor and privilege of writing homework then teaching for the past four weeks and have treasured every minute of. The more I contemplate, the more ‘bittersweet’ seems such an appropriate word for me as well.
I adore the women at my table. We have developed relationships of mutual encouragement. The older women encourage the younger with their new marriages and young children. They in turn encourage those with college age children as they faced many of the issues our kids face and have come out stronger and closer to God. We look forward to our weekly fellowship and it is one of the highlights of our week.
I have always been in ministry, much of it leading women’s ministry and bible studies. Since moving back to the US three years ago it has been a struggle to find my place in a mega church with a young staff. With a degree in Bible and Christian Education, along with a heart to teach, there are few things that give me as much joy as teaching God’s Word. Yet, there really hasn’t been a place for that gift here.
It is not only the size of the church but also today’s focus on media that causes this dilemma. With incredible teachers like Beth Moore with her video lessons available, there are few that would rather hear a live speech by a woman in their local church then sit under Beth. Even I am not one of those few!
Therefore, it honestly is a privilege to teach and not something I take lightly. Every minute of preparation and delivery was treasured.
So I am left feeling bittersweet as well. I hope there will be given another opportunity down the road.
In the meantime, some of my girls and I are heading off to a Beth Moore conference tomorrow! We can’t wait!