The Madness of Hope

Apples, Kisses and Fowling the Air

As a kid I loved visiting Malawi. There were apples there. There were none in Zambia where I lived so apples were a a luxury; a delicacy. We would slowly nibble every morsel of flesh, sucking every drop of juice from the core,sometimes even consuming the core. Living in a land of apple abundance, one can never understand the pure, simple extravagance of eating an apple.

There were also weird laws in Malawi. We had to wear long dresses at all times. Even in Zambian cities we could wear dresses above the knee and pants. Not in Malawi.

Kissing was outlawed. I remember one time watching TV in Malawi. They were showing Little House on the Prairie; also a special event as we did not have such shows in Zambia. On this particular episode the father bent down to kiss his daughter good night and a huge black splotch appeared on the TV. The government had blotted it out.

When one bought a book to read in Malawi, there would often have pages torn out. Usually it was a kiss, maybe more, but even a kiss warranted a missing page. One always hoped the kiss did not come at the end of the story as you would be left hanging.

Somethings never change. Thirty years later and a new law was just passed in Malawi. Last week I read an article in the UK Daily Mail. It read, "The government of Malawi plans to punish persistent offenders 'who foul the air' in a bid to 'mould responsible and disciplined citizens.'"

However the article goes on to say that many locals fear that 'pinning responsibility on the crime will be difficult - and may lead to miscarriages of justice as 'criminals' attempt to blame others for their offence'.

Here we protest mandatory health care, gun control, abortion rights and ear marks. In Malawi they target kisses, bad manners and caring people wanting to adopt their babies.

Even so, I still love Malawi!

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1351174/African-country-set-make-breaking-wind-crime
Opposition leaders complain the new courts will be 'kangaroo courts'..html#ixzz1DLL29Qy5