This past year, God has been forming a vision in my heart and mind of reaching out to women outside of my local church. I have been involved in leading women’s bible studies since the year I graduated from Bible College in 1983. However, He seems to impress on me more and more the need for evangelism and a call for women to see their God ordained call to serve Him in whatever live stage they are in. The task seems daunting at times. Who am I? Returning to the United States to live was so humbling for me. All the sudden I was in the company of so many talented women serving God. I am not eloquent, nor beautiful. I do not have a powerful testimony of how God saved me from the debts of sin and despair. He did save me from my many sins but the story is not one that many flock to hear. Besides the fact that I am only ‘me’, there is the difficulty of finding the venue to share Christ. A couple months ago I prayed, “God, if you really want me to use my gift of speaking, please show me by letting just one person ask me to speak.” Within a few days, I had an invitation to speak at a fundraiser for handicapped children, a Christmas event for a ladies group, and a twelve week bible study at my church. I put out a fleece, as did Gideon in Joshua 6, and God sent invitations. Yet, still my heart is at loss as to where to go with this ministry. So I go back to the story of Gideon. When Gideon expressed his doubts as to his ability to lead the Israelite army against the Midianites, God just answered, “I will be with you.” Then God proceeded to strip away what little ammunition Gideon had in the way of numbers until he was left with only three hundred men to fight the overwhelmingly large Midianite army. God wanted to make sure that all the glory would go back to Him. I am left reflecting on what God calls me to do. If this is His calling on my life, I just have to trust that God will be with me and provide the venue to minister. Then, when all is over, the glory will all go to God. For, if I do not seek an invitation, it will have come from Him alone. If it comes from Him, I will know it is His will that I obey. God has been working in my heart as He is casting a vision for where he wants me to go. He is changing some of my desires and direction and in so doing, puts me outside of comfort level. That is good because it is causing me to trust more and more on Him: to rely not on my own abilities, but on His power to go before me and fight the battles He is leading me in to. My heart’s desire is that as the trumpet is blown and people hear the Word of the Lord, that the jar will be broken. As the jar is broken, may the light of Jesus spread throughout the world. What about you? Where is God leading you to serve? Is there a trumpet He wants you to sound and a jar to break? I pray none of us will be the ones who are sent home for lack of faith. Let’s step out and obey God in whatever He is calling us to do.
